No Ifs. No Ands. No "Butts."

Waist High would again like to say "Thank You" to M.P., the individual who handed Waist High her first cigarette in 1984. Thanks. I am really loving this nicotine withdrawal, this sleeplessness, this extreme irritability, this constipation, this nervousness, and this complete inability to relax. If I am ever in Salt Lake City, I am going to find you and possibly strangle you.

This writer is now 7 days smoke free. She has been guided intelligently through this past week by a classic work of FICTION. Some kind of fairy tale.

Note to authors of The Complete Idiot's Guide To Quitting Smoking, the following ARE NOT realistic substitutes to smoking: "Calling a friend," "Going somewhere else," "Showering immediately," "Writing a letter," or "Climbing a tree."

Additionally, I did not think the following was a good approach to take: "It's also a good idea to link up your quit date with another date that has significance for you. It could be a birthday or an anniversary. Maybe it's the day you graduated from school, your child's birthday, or the anniversary date OF YOUR PARENT'S DEATH FROM A SMOKING RELATED ILLNESS."

I did appreciate the following however, "Use this checklist to go through your home, office, and car and remove the (now) offensive items:
[] Lighters and matches
[] Ashtrays
[] Breath mints and gum
[] Tobacco company T-shirts, caps or other items