Bakersfield Police Department. Doing Their Part To Make America Safe.

It's good to know my hometown is now safe.

(bakersfield.com) The Bakersfield Police Department cracked down on curfew Wednesday night.

In an effort to clean up the streets of Bakersfield, the BPD deployed one half of their force Wednesday night to catch mischievous teens out past the 10 p.m. curfew. The officers said they would focus on several Bakersfield hangouts.

Police get frequent calls for loitering at The Marketplace, THE TACO BELL ON MING AVENUE, and the fast-food parking lots at White Lane and Gosford Road.

"That is messed up!" said 14-year-old Christina Sparks, a new freshman at Liberty High School. "There's no where else in Bakersfield," she said. "Cause Bakersfield's stupid."

Hey Christina, we need to talk. Sounds like you might need a tutorial from Waist High. I have a manual I could send you. It's called, Bakersfield and All it's Nooks and Crannies: Where and How to Have Fun in a Town That's Mainly Dirt.

I don't think hanging out in the parking lots of fast food places on White Lane is really taking advantage of all that Bakersfield has to offer.

Chapter one in the manual: "Where to Go if You Wanna Loiter and Drink Without Too Much BPD Harassment."
Chapter two is simply: "How My Former Spouse Claims He and His Buddy Are Two of the Original Founders of the Whole 'Let's Party in a Dirt Field' Idea."
Chapter three: "How to Get Drunk on $5.00 a Night."
Chapter four: "Why Garces High and West High Football Players Should Never Party Together."
Chapter five: "Kroll Park Sump: The Ultimate Hangout."
Chapter six: "Fail Safe Techniques For Drinking More on a Full Stomach: Blowing Chunks 101."
Chapter seven: "Why Robbing a Beer Truck Might Now Land You in the Penitentiary."
Chapter eight: "Cutting School to Drink: Where to Go in the Light of Day."

And finally, Chapter nine: "Where and What to Eat if You are Drunk: Staying Away From Der Weiner Schnitzel."